Have you ever really loved something, only to have that thing/person/band/television show/etc. do something that so completely turns you off you have to just cut them out of your life?

And you feel silly about it, because it’s just a band/movie/fandom/etc. and in the great scheme of things it’s not really all that important, but at the same time you’re really upset, because you put a lot of time and effort into whatever, and even though you know it has absolutely nothing to do with you, you can’t help but feel a sense of betrayal.

I was ditzing around with my trilogy playlist again this morning, and I came across some Nightwish music. You guys have probably heard me talk about Nightwish before. They’re a symphonic metal band from Finland, and they were the first band I truly loved. I knew all the members’ names and stalked every new single and album. (Of which I own a lot.)

Nightwish has been since 1999 or something. I found them in 2006, while they were between singers. They’d apparently asked the first one to leave, had an open letter explaining why on their website, and they’d yet to announce a replacement. So I found them and fell in love with them in this lull, and then they hired a new singer and released a new single and I loved her and I loved the song and I loved everything.

I saw them in concert every time they swung through the States. The latest time was in October 2012. I’d talked some friends into going to the concert, but the whole thing turned out to be a whole mess. Apparently the singer had had to go to the hospital because she was so sick, so they decided to play the set without her, recruiting the back-up vocalists from the opening band to sing. Now, these girls are excellent singers in their own rights, but they didn’t know the music (and at one point weren’t even singing the right song). It was painful. And I was embarrassed, because it was honestly the worst concert I’d ever been to, and I’d dragged my friends along and they will probably never go to a concert with me again.

One bad night doesn’t equal betrayal. But the next day, after she recovered, the singer expressed some disappointment that they’d decided to go on without her or without even asking her, and the band fired her.

It’s entirely possible that they were already having issues, but that was what did it for me. Firing one singer might have been a fluke, but two seems like just part of a horrible trend. I was so appalled at their behavior that I haven’t been able to listen to them since without this horrible feeling sinking into my stomach.

(I did listen to a couple of songs this morning and damn if the music isn’t amazing. Still upset about it, though.)

Has anything/anyone who’ve really loved ever done something that’s turned you off?

When Things You Love Betray You
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Books by Kit Campbell

City of Hope and Ruin cover
Shards cover
Hidden Worlds cover